‘I’m alive today because of my sisters’
The incredible story of earthquake survivor Kikie Seide – and how Phi Sig love keeps her strong
April 17, 2010
NOT A DAY GOES BY WHEN KAPRISKIE "KIKIE" SEIDE doesn’t think about her beloved home of Haiti, or of the devastation wreaked by the massive earthquake that struck the capital of Port-au-Prince while she was visiting family during winter break.
As you might imagine, she talks about it with some difficulty. It’s hard to remember some things, she explains. The timeline isn’t 100% clear – how she and her mother, who was seriously injured in the quake, were able to get help, transport themselves to the Dominican Republic and eventually fly to Miami, where they are currently staying with family.
What is clear is how much her sisterhood within Phi Sig has meant in the weeks and months since that terrible day on Jan. 12 when the 7.0-magnitude earthquake shook her island to pieces – leaving an unspeakable toll in casualties, homelessness and damage that stunned the world and still receives daily media attention.
‘Lucky to be a Phi Sig’
“I don’t really know how I would be alive today without my sisters,” Kikie, 20, a junior and sociology major, says simply of the love she receives from the Zeta Rho Chapter at Fitchburg State College in Massachusetts. “They are my main support system, and they keep me going.”
Throughout the day, she’ll receive text messages and phone calls, e-mails and jokes – every kind of communication remotely possible from sisters who want her to know she’s very much on their minds… from sisters who are beyond relieved that she survived the quake and, come this fall, will once again return to college and their chapter.
If she’s having a tough day, remembering what happened and trying to cope with the aftermath, “…it’s not as bad, because of all the love I feel from them,” she says. “I tell myself, ‘Love is all that matters. I am loved.’ I am thankful to God every day for them, and I find myself lucky – very, very lucky, to be a Phi Sig.”
Surviving the earthquake
Her sisters have become her new “cozy place” in the world, the way she once described her Haitian home, where she was born and raised most of her life.
Haiti, a country much maligned by the media for its poverty and political upheaval, is one of the loveliest places on earth, to hear Kikie speak about it. It’s a place where the people care deeply for one another, are kind to strangers, love to laugh and sing, and try to find the beauty in life everyday. The island is equally beautiful – or, at least it was before the earthquake left much of the capital, including her grandfather’s home, in ruins.
Kikie remembers when the earthquake struck that afternoon: how the 4-story building shook until it fell down. “I’m still trying to figure it out,” she says, a slight accent in her voice. (She moved to the United States in her teens.) “It was like being in a movie…. I’ve tried hard to think of how to describe it to you. It was like putting a pencil into a box and shaking it, and you’re in the box. That’s the only way I can make people understand.”
Pieces of the building fell all around her, her mother and her grandfather. You couldn’t keep your balance because of the violence of the quake, she explained. There was nowhere to go – and no time to get outside.
When it was over (and before the aftershocks began), Kikie and her grandfather were miraculously OK – only slightly hurt. The home had fallen all around them. But Kikie’s mother – who worked as a nurse back in the states – was wounded, her leg severed by a fallen wall.
Kikie found a hole in the rubble and went out into the streets – where she saw firsthand the chaos and devastation that the rest of the world watched on television. People were crying and milling around. Everyone was stunned.
It took her five hours to find help. In the end, it was Kikie who had to follow her own mother’s instructions on how to care for her – who, in the days following, had to go into the hospital and gather the supplies necessary to tend to her mother’s wounds. (She recognizes she helped to save her mother’s life, but seems reluctant to take credit for that – saying her mother guided her on what to do.) No one stopped her from taking what was needed. The city was in chaos – and everyone faced the same grim realities around them.
“There was no one else to do it for you,” Kikie explains. “My father found us an old mattress, and we stayed outside in the hospital yard.” She’s not sure how long they waited, or when her mother – who had lost her leg – was stable enough to travel to the Dominican Republic. Much of this time is a blur.
Dark days – and then, a miracle…
Back home, most of her sisters hadn’t realized Kikie was in danger until their advisor, Sandra Waronen, made Headquarters and the chapter aware she was still in Haiti when the earthquake hit, says Archon Amanda Erickson.
“It was awful,” she adds. “Everyone was a mess. We were so worried, but we had no way to contact her. We didn’t know if she was OK. We held chapter meetings simply to discuss our feelings…. I realized there’s only so much I can do as a leader to help: I can’t give false hope, but I have to keep spirits high, too.”
Within days following the quake, the chapter mobilized to spread the word about Kikie – and to make efforts to learn of her whereabouts. They connected with her uncle, and joined a Facebook group called “Love and Support for Kikie!” – where they shared their heartfelt emotions and innermost fears. They kept the campus informed of any news, but there wasn’t much.
These were the dark days, when everyone was praying for a miracle.
That miracle finally came in the form of a phone call Jan. 21 – when the chapter learned Kikie and her mother were coming home. According to Amanda, Fitchburg State College funded the flight from the Dominican Republic to Miami. “The campus has been so supportive,” she says.
Love and support
But more tough times were ahead for the Seide family. Because Kikie’s mom would need to recover in Miami, they lost their income and their apartment in Massachusetts.
Aware that their sister needed help, Zeta Rho launched a series of fundraisers benefiting Kikie – raising an estimated $2,000 (and maybe more, but Amanda says no one was counting), as well as sending clothes, personal-care products and other things Kikie and her mom might need.
The Greek community at Fitchburg even came to their aid, organizing a karaoke event March 25 to support Kikie.
“It’s overwhelming,” Kikie says of it all, pausing from the emotion. “Thanks to them, we are able to survive. Thanks to their love, we’re able to live.”
Amanda says the chapter is planning other ways to help Kikie return to campus, including defraying the costs of her Phi Sig membership fees. Still, Amanda adds, Kikie insists she wants no money for herself.
“She told us she’s using the money we sent to help pay for her mom’s prosthetic leg,” Amanda says, clearly amazed. “Here she is, she’s lost so much, but she’s so grateful that she actually wants us to raise money for others in need. So, we’re doing that – but we have plans for her return, too. We want her to come home to us.”
Surprise reunion
Several weeks ago, Kikie was able to make a surprise visit north – and spent six days with her sisters.
It was just what the doctor ordered – for her, and for the chapter, Amanda says. “I can’t even describe what it was like, seeing her – really seeing her, knowing she was OK.”
Kikie – who loves to laugh, and whom her sisters know to be a strong, gentle and happy soul – laughs aloud, joyfully, to recall what it was like being reunited with her Zeta Rho sisters: “They were crazy!” she says over and over. “There was screaming, and I don’t know…. (She laughs.) It was just crazy!”
Now back in Miami, she feels even closer to her sisters, and understands that Phi Sig women the world over who may have heard she was missing have followed the story with compassion and concern – and care about her and her future.
She still needs time to adjust, she says – but she’s doing OK, she adds. She values and deeply appreciates the messages of love and support (which still appear on the Facebook group, even now). And she looks forward to resuming classes at Fitchburg in the fall – and especially to returning to her sisters.
In the meantime, the chapter is accepting messages on Kikie’s behalf
at the following address, Amanda says: americkson214@gmail.com.
“Everyone loves Kikie,” Amanda explains. “She’s just that kind of person.” And, Kikie will tell you, no one loves her more than her devoted Phi Sigma Sigma sisters at Zeta Rho, where both her heart and home truly resides.